So its been awhile since I blog last. I have been reading Jennys blog and it got me in the mood to blog myself. Lately I have been working and in school. I am in paramedic school currently and have been since last November. I get done with class this November. (I CAN'T WAIT) This past year has been great. Jenny and I are starting to learn how to live with one another. We have learned a lot about one another. I have been in school and have had so much support from Jenny. Its really cool to realize that not only will finishing school help me out in my career, but now it will help out my family. Jenny and I are so blessed to be at the Jobs we are and to have one another. Not only do Jenny and I have one another, but we also have a dog. Bentley is so much fun and I love having him. I love coming home from work and he is right there at the door waiting to greet you. It is one of my favoirte things about getting off work. Right now I really feel like my life is going great (Knock on wood). I have a beautiful wife that loves me, an awsome dog, a wonderful family that loves unconditional. I now am an Uncle, thanks to my sister and brother-In-Law having Caleb. I have some of the best friend in the world. All in all life is good.
Random thoughts for the day.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Friday, March 26, 2010
why do i get annoyed with people
So i have recently realized that i really get annoyed by people and what they do or say. For what ever reason i am very critical of ppl. I dont know why cause i am not perfect but i guess i just am set in my ways and what i beleive, that when someone does or says something that does not agree with that i get annoyed. Its like once i have decided that a person annoys me i cant even listen to them without getting mad. I dont know i dont like that i do it but i just cant see why they do that, but its really me not them, but in my mine its them.
Well anyways it the greatest time of the year. MARCH MADNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love march for this reason. I love college basketball, and in march the best games are on. The basketball games seem to just put me in a good mood.
I have been reading a lot more then usual so thats been sweet. I started on Acts a few weeks ago and have been reading it and now jenny and i are doing the 150 psalms in 150 days since march 17th was 150 days away from the wedding. Its been really cool cause i am actually sticking with it. So thats whats been going on in my life since it been awhile since my last blog.
141 days left
Well anyways it the greatest time of the year. MARCH MADNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love march for this reason. I love college basketball, and in march the best games are on. The basketball games seem to just put me in a good mood.
I have been reading a lot more then usual so thats been sweet. I started on Acts a few weeks ago and have been reading it and now jenny and i are doing the 150 psalms in 150 days since march 17th was 150 days away from the wedding. Its been really cool cause i am actually sticking with it. So thats whats been going on in my life since it been awhile since my last blog.
141 days left
Monday, February 22, 2010
The Man I Want To Be
So there is this new song by this country artist that i reall like. His name is Chris Young. He also sings another song called black dress, which is a fantastic song that talks about getting his girl home and dropping her black dress. So its pretty sweet. But anyways back to this song which is called "The man i want to be". The song talks about a man who is talking to God and asking God to make him into a new man for his wife. Some of the lyrics are so cool cause they are some of the same things i have prayed for, for the past 5 years.
God, I'm down here on my knees cause its the last place left to fall.
Beggin for another chance if theres any chance at all that you might still be listenin
Loving and forgivin guys like me, I've spent my whole life getting it all wrong and i sure
could use your help cause from now on
I want to be a good man a do like i should man
I want to be the kind of man the mirror likes to see
I want to be a strong man and admit that i was wrong man
God, i'm asking you to come change me into the man i want to be
If theres anyway for her and me to make another start
could you see what you could do to put some love back in her heart?
Cause it goin to take a miracle
after all i've done to really make her see
That i want to be a stay man
I want to be a brave man
I want to be the kind of man she sees in her dreams
God, i want to be your man
And i want to be her man
God, i only hope she still believes in the man i want to be.
Well i know this late at night the talk is cheap but Lord dont give up on me.
I want to be a givin man
I want to really start livin man
God, I'm asking you to come change me into the man i want to be.
_________________________________________________
So this song kind of says everything that i have wanted for Jenny and my ralationship.
I want God to come change me into the man that i really want to be.
I want to be His man and I want to be her man. But i want to be His man first. I want to be a strong man (Spiritually) which is a work in progress. i want to be able to look in the mirror and like what i see.
So for me i feel like this subject is a broken record for me but its whats on my mind the most. How i want to be a different man for the Lord and if i can do that how i will be a different man for Jenny. I have 173 days until i am married. So from now until then i am going to become that man. Mark my work, i need to be for Him and for her.
God I am asking you to come change me into the man i want to be.
God, I'm down here on my knees cause its the last place left to fall.
Beggin for another chance if theres any chance at all that you might still be listenin
Loving and forgivin guys like me, I've spent my whole life getting it all wrong and i sure
could use your help cause from now on
I want to be a good man a do like i should man
I want to be the kind of man the mirror likes to see
I want to be a strong man and admit that i was wrong man
God, i'm asking you to come change me into the man i want to be
If theres anyway for her and me to make another start
could you see what you could do to put some love back in her heart?
Cause it goin to take a miracle
after all i've done to really make her see
That i want to be a stay man
I want to be a brave man
I want to be the kind of man she sees in her dreams
God, i want to be your man
And i want to be her man
God, i only hope she still believes in the man i want to be.
Well i know this late at night the talk is cheap but Lord dont give up on me.
I want to be a givin man
I want to really start livin man
God, I'm asking you to come change me into the man i want to be.
_________________________________________________
So this song kind of says everything that i have wanted for Jenny and my ralationship.
I want God to come change me into the man that i really want to be.
I want to be His man and I want to be her man. But i want to be His man first. I want to be a strong man (Spiritually) which is a work in progress. i want to be able to look in the mirror and like what i see.
So for me i feel like this subject is a broken record for me but its whats on my mind the most. How i want to be a different man for the Lord and if i can do that how i will be a different man for Jenny. I have 173 days until i am married. So from now until then i am going to become that man. Mark my work, i need to be for Him and for her.
God I am asking you to come change me into the man i want to be.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Nothing really to crazy
So there is was really nothing to carzy that has been going on since my last blog on the 27th. I have been working and doing a little YL stuff. I go to go up to Oak hills on Thursday, which was really cool cause all of my co-leaders were there except for mike. We got to meet some new teachers and just see some kids. We ended up spending close to an hour at the school. Then on Friday i got to watch the fourth quarter of the boys bb game and watched a kid that i no but really dont no play.
Its really crazy how different high school is now compared to a few years ago when i was in. Maybe its just the size of Oak Hills compared to Taylor, but i feel like a high schooler is a high schooler no matter where they go. Its just so much different the way kids interact with each other and the things they are getting involved with. I guess that just the progression of kids today. I just started to think about it after going up to the school and hearing to girls argue over getting "layed". I guess. And then after i bowled on Friday night i saw 2 kids fighting out in public and the one kid took his shirt off. IT WAS 17 DEGREES OUTSIDE, ARE YOU NUTS. i just laught and they were fighting over who was more drunk. Again i guess.
Then today i went to a Swim/dive meet at UC for Oak Hills. I have never been to a swim meet and let me tell you, they are weird. Its like "be quite" then cheer then, "be quite" the cheer and it goes on and on. But anyways i saw a few guys there which is always good.
Did not read again today.
195 days left.
Its really crazy how different high school is now compared to a few years ago when i was in. Maybe its just the size of Oak Hills compared to Taylor, but i feel like a high schooler is a high schooler no matter where they go. Its just so much different the way kids interact with each other and the things they are getting involved with. I guess that just the progression of kids today. I just started to think about it after going up to the school and hearing to girls argue over getting "layed". I guess. And then after i bowled on Friday night i saw 2 kids fighting out in public and the one kid took his shirt off. IT WAS 17 DEGREES OUTSIDE, ARE YOU NUTS. i just laught and they were fighting over who was more drunk. Again i guess.
Then today i went to a Swim/dive meet at UC for Oak Hills. I have never been to a swim meet and let me tell you, they are weird. Its like "be quite" then cheer then, "be quite" the cheer and it goes on and on. But anyways i saw a few guys there which is always good.
Did not read again today.
195 days left.
Communication
1-27-10
So why is it so hard for two people to communicate with one another? It seems like I am asking myself this question a lot lately. Why can’t I tell her what I want when I want and how I want? I love her and care deeply about her but still, she makes it hard. And apparently its not just hard for me its hard for her too. We had a fight tonight over paint. LOL yes paint. We are getting ready to paint our house and we are trying to figure out what colors we want. Well I brought it up tonight while watching tv. I felt bad cause I can watch tv when she leaves so I suggested we do something, so I went and got the paint schemes that we got from home depot. Well it seemed as if she could care less what I was doing and made that very clear since she never got up and looked at anything with me.
I guess the biggest issue we run into is that we think we know each other so well, which we do, but whenever something is said a certain way or not said at all we get hurt by it, cause we thought it would go different. Like with the paint. I thought she would want to take more of a role in it. I guess not. Well that lead to me being a total ASS, but when emotions are running wild we do things that hurt others. Because of the way I acted after that it caused her to leave, which really sucks cause I did not get to see her the last two nights but I was so angry with her at the time I did not care.
Had an ok day today up until that whole episode. Had to work which was super busy and then I got to do a hang out night with my YL team. I was really looking forward to it and was very happy to have it at my house. The goal for the night was to not talk about any business and just be with one another cause there are some people on the team that think some of us don’t care about each other. Mike made dinner which was very good by the way. After that we played a game. The game was really cool and got all of us talking and laughing. I guess I build things up in my head to be something, and then when they fall short of that I get my feelings hurt. It’s just I thought we would play this game and then just hang out and just be with each other. Well the second the game was over it seemed as if Beth and Alison had to be somewhere else. It’s just made me feel like being with there team was not a priority. It kind of funny how the same people that complain are the same people that cause some of the problems. It just hurt my feelings to see them do. I felt like a gas station where people just come in and use the restroom and then just leave. Its like if there was no restroom here then you would not even stop by. Like I said maybe its how I built it up in my head but regardless I was hurt.
Did not read again today.
199 days left
So why is it so hard for two people to communicate with one another? It seems like I am asking myself this question a lot lately. Why can’t I tell her what I want when I want and how I want? I love her and care deeply about her but still, she makes it hard. And apparently its not just hard for me its hard for her too. We had a fight tonight over paint. LOL yes paint. We are getting ready to paint our house and we are trying to figure out what colors we want. Well I brought it up tonight while watching tv. I felt bad cause I can watch tv when she leaves so I suggested we do something, so I went and got the paint schemes that we got from home depot. Well it seemed as if she could care less what I was doing and made that very clear since she never got up and looked at anything with me.
I guess the biggest issue we run into is that we think we know each other so well, which we do, but whenever something is said a certain way or not said at all we get hurt by it, cause we thought it would go different. Like with the paint. I thought she would want to take more of a role in it. I guess not. Well that lead to me being a total ASS, but when emotions are running wild we do things that hurt others. Because of the way I acted after that it caused her to leave, which really sucks cause I did not get to see her the last two nights but I was so angry with her at the time I did not care.
Had an ok day today up until that whole episode. Had to work which was super busy and then I got to do a hang out night with my YL team. I was really looking forward to it and was very happy to have it at my house. The goal for the night was to not talk about any business and just be with one another cause there are some people on the team that think some of us don’t care about each other. Mike made dinner which was very good by the way. After that we played a game. The game was really cool and got all of us talking and laughing. I guess I build things up in my head to be something, and then when they fall short of that I get my feelings hurt. It’s just I thought we would play this game and then just hang out and just be with each other. Well the second the game was over it seemed as if Beth and Alison had to be somewhere else. It’s just made me feel like being with there team was not a priority. It kind of funny how the same people that complain are the same people that cause some of the problems. It just hurt my feelings to see them do. I felt like a gas station where people just come in and use the restroom and then just leave. Its like if there was no restroom here then you would not even stop by. Like I said maybe its how I built it up in my head but regardless I was hurt.
Did not read again today.
199 days left
Trying times
So its hard to blog when you have no internet at your house so this blog and the next are actually done be on 1-25-10 and 1-27-10.
So the more I thought about the whole air port job thing the more I realized that the air port job was something that I wanted for me, and was not something I wanted God to help me with. The job was something that I thought would make me happy with my life, but in all reality if I would have gotten the job I would still be lost with the Lord. So actually by not getting the job I realized all this, so I guess God knew that so that might be why I did not get the job.
So today I did not feel very well, I had to work and had a migraine. Outside of the head ach I had a very boring day. We had no runs which always sucks cause it sets up for a long day. After work I had to go home cause I am an idiot and turned the heat of in my house, (which in freezing temp. that is not a good idea). And the more I thought about it the more I realized that me turning off the thermostat this morning is exactly what I have been doing in my life. I am an idiot and have turned the heat off in my life and not allowing any heat to come in. (heat being Jesus) and the only way the heat can come back on is for me to come home and turn the thermostat back on. No one is going to do it for me cause no one else has a key to my house (house being my heart) I am the only one who can change any of it, so I can leave the thermostat off and have my pipes burst which would be really bad, or turn it back on and have heat throughout my house. So I just need to decide.
But anyways had Yl tonight and it was sweet cause we have two guys that came this week and last week. They are two really cool guys, Nathan and Ryan. Nathan goes to Elder which is going to be weird but cool for me (cause of my strong dislike for the catholic church). And then ryan who is a swimmer and a soccer player and recently lost his dad. So hoping to get to know him to a point where I will be able to talk to him about that.
Working a 24 hour shift tomorrow at the delhi and hoping we are busy.
So the more I thought about the whole air port job thing the more I realized that the air port job was something that I wanted for me, and was not something I wanted God to help me with. The job was something that I thought would make me happy with my life, but in all reality if I would have gotten the job I would still be lost with the Lord. So actually by not getting the job I realized all this, so I guess God knew that so that might be why I did not get the job.
So today I did not feel very well, I had to work and had a migraine. Outside of the head ach I had a very boring day. We had no runs which always sucks cause it sets up for a long day. After work I had to go home cause I am an idiot and turned the heat of in my house, (which in freezing temp. that is not a good idea). And the more I thought about it the more I realized that me turning off the thermostat this morning is exactly what I have been doing in my life. I am an idiot and have turned the heat off in my life and not allowing any heat to come in. (heat being Jesus) and the only way the heat can come back on is for me to come home and turn the thermostat back on. No one is going to do it for me cause no one else has a key to my house (house being my heart) I am the only one who can change any of it, so I can leave the thermostat off and have my pipes burst which would be really bad, or turn it back on and have heat throughout my house. So I just need to decide.
But anyways had Yl tonight and it was sweet cause we have two guys that came this week and last week. They are two really cool guys, Nathan and Ryan. Nathan goes to Elder which is going to be weird but cool for me (cause of my strong dislike for the catholic church). And then ryan who is a swimmer and a soccer player and recently lost his dad. So hoping to get to know him to a point where I will be able to talk to him about that.
Working a 24 hour shift tomorrow at the delhi and hoping we are busy.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Thats what i love about sundays
What does it really mean to be a spiritual leader? Its hard for me to say what that means or what that looks like. Its hard for me to resemble something i have never seen before. Its hard cause i know jenny deserves a better spiritual leader. I find it hard to be that type of leader sometimes. Anyways that is something i pray about often and struggle with.
I had a pretty good day today, relaxed for most of it. Got off work this morning at 6 am and came home and slept till about 12 noon. I love my sundays. It is just suck a good day! Jenny and i did our devotional today which was really good. We are doing this devotional on getting married, (Cause we are in 202 days) the hardest part of the devotional is actually doing it. We always find excuses to not do it, (and when i say we i really mean me) but the times we do it has been good. We have alot more to do in it so the big thing for us is just going to make sure we are doing it every week. Its cool to hear what jenny has to say about somethings about what she wants marriage to look like. We have been able to talk about SEX, living together, sacrifices, living for one another, and much more.
Anyways today was a good day, another day with no reading, well i did read in the devotional if that counts, not sure, but hey we can count it. Well long day at work tomorrow and then YL tomorrow night.
I had a pretty good day today, relaxed for most of it. Got off work this morning at 6 am and came home and slept till about 12 noon. I love my sundays. It is just suck a good day! Jenny and i did our devotional today which was really good. We are doing this devotional on getting married, (Cause we are in 202 days) the hardest part of the devotional is actually doing it. We always find excuses to not do it, (and when i say we i really mean me) but the times we do it has been good. We have alot more to do in it so the big thing for us is just going to make sure we are doing it every week. Its cool to hear what jenny has to say about somethings about what she wants marriage to look like. We have been able to talk about SEX, living together, sacrifices, living for one another, and much more.
Anyways today was a good day, another day with no reading, well i did read in the devotional if that counts, not sure, but hey we can count it. Well long day at work tomorrow and then YL tomorrow night.
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Firefighter at a Cross
